omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
