Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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