I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Houston, we have a blender
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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