is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
