Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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