Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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