I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
