I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
a search helicopter?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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