Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize