he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
