Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
