There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
