Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
My bed smells like the plague
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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