my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
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He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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