that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
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and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
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I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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