I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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