But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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