Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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