dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize