the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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