I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We left an ass print on the piano.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
