there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
