It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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