***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Randomize
