I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
