have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Randomize
