Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
