I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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