Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
