i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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