pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
