sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
