Its about making memories worth repressing
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
