Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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