season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize
