I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
