that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
