Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Someone signed my nipple.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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