After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
