I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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