He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
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