Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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