I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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