just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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