Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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