My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
