He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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