so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
