I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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