I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
