and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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